The truth is I don’t know how you’re going to make it. Or how I’m going to make it. Or even what it means to “make it”.

When it comes to the tough stuff, there seems to be little “to do” to speed up the process of growth or to “make it happen” as the demanding saying goes. 

At the same time, there are lots of ways to prevent or slow down our natural growth processes. For example, we can decide others are judging us or our choices or our dreams, and then get defensive or, worse, shut down. Or we can have a few drinks to numb what we’re feeling for a couple of hours before it comes slamming down with even more ferocity. Either way, we have to ride it out. Like the wave. 

And since the waves are coming whether we like it or not, maybe it’s more about finding ways to stay on your board. 

Staying on your board doesn’t mean that the big waves aren’t going to suddenly appear and threaten to knock you down. Staying on your board means feeling all of the fear, surprise, delight, and pain that comes and goes in your life, finding your center in all of it, and doing your best to not judge or label any of the waves. 

Think about it: When we watch the ocean, we do not judge waves as right or wrong, good or bad. We don’t think of a receding wave as a cowardice or a crashing wave as inherently evil. We don’t look at a soft wave and decide, “Ahh, now that wave right there, that’s a ‘good’ wave… that’s the way a wave should behave.” Or when witnessing a slamming wave, we don’t insist, “My, my… tsk tsk… that’s an awful, terrible, no-good wave. It should have behaved like that soft wave.” 

No, thank goodness, we do not do that. They are all just waves. The constant ebb and flow of that particular expression of life. No judgement. Just IS-ness. And if we look closely, each wave truly is a delightful expression of nature’s beauty and countless manifestations. No two alike… It’s utterly sublime. Mesmerizing. 

The other thing about waves—both in the ocean and in life—is that all waves pass. Nothing is permanent. The bone crushing, mind numbing wave doesn’t last. But The deliriously delightful and delicious wave doesn’t last either. Pretending that any one wave can last, clutching to that idea is what hurts so much. The desire to make it all ‘pleasant’… Is that even really what we want? 

(That question needs to be its own blog post.) 😊

For now, I want to share the four fastest ways I use to stay on my own board: 

BREATHE. When I’m feeling uncomfortable, I go to my breath first. What’s happening there? If I’m afraid or anxious, my breath usually goes shallow. So I have to consciously deepen it, usually bringing it into my heart, as I remind myself that I am safe, so I can calm my nervous system and open myself up to new possibilities and interpretations.

MOVE. After I allow myself to fully feel the discomfort and deepen my breath right into it, I usually physically shake the episode and accompanying feelings out of my body. How I do it: I put on a fast-paced song and shake through each part of my body, giving all those uncomfortable sensations back to wherever they came from so I can find the lessons and truths underneath them.

MAKE NOISE. While I’m shaking, I allow myself to express in words, tears, and sounds the anger/fear/anxiety/{any uncomfortable sensation} that I want to release. I ask for support from the Universe, from God, from angels, from fairies, from masters (ascended and amongst us) … Seriously. I call all my A-team players to help me move through the pain and back into pleasure.

GET OUTSIDE. Nature is the heart of healing and restoration. If I’m going through something particularly difficult, I’ll get to a secluded place and combine my movement outdoors with repetition of what I want to feel, the direction I want to move in… I will repeat mantras or questions about this new direction in my mind until I feel a sense of ease and excitement in my body and in my psyche. 


Those are some mighty fast state-shifters right there. I’ve used ’em to ride out both big and small waves, while pursuing my creative dreams in Italy. My promise: If you use them, solo or combined, you will start moving through the mud and muck so you can rise into the magnificent lotus you are meant to be! 

Let me hear about your experiments with these practices in the comments below. 😊 Thanks!